Giving It My All: Interrupted

We interrupt the following program for a very crappy announcement. I'll just get right to it. Our FET has been cancelled!

Today started off as an exciting day. I finally made it to my lining check u/s. My lining has always been "beautiful" (doctor's words). So I went into the appt with full expectation of hearing the same. I first had my blood drawn to check my estradiol and then headed to the u/s room. She first did an abdominal u/s. I've become quite good at reading u/s, but this time, I didn't recognize my uterus. She then did an intra-vaginal u/s. She measured the lining in a couple of different areas, but it still didn't look familiar. I asked if there was a triple pattern and she said no, it actually looked like I was about to start my period. My heart sank.

She said she would email the u/s photos to ccrm and then I left. Half way home I couldn't contain it any longer, I burst into tears. I called my IVF nurse and she then called my local clinic and told them to run a progesterone level on the same blood. I would then wait and wait and wait some more. I lost track how many phone calls and emails I went through trying to get all the info and photos to ccrm.

6 hours after my u/s, I was still waiting, still unable to stop the tears. By now I'm nauseous. My results finally come in but my IVF nurse needed time to go over everything with Schoolie.

Here's the results:

E2: 728 (perfect, they want it > 300)
P4: 0.08 (perfect, means I did not ovulate through the drugs)
Lining Thickness: 7.9 - 9.9mm (perfect, they want it > 8)
Lining Pattern: No triple pattern (bad!)

I then received the dreaded call, I'm cancelled. Schoolie looked at the u/s photos and said there appeared to be a lot of "junk" in there and he did not want to use that lining considering what's at risk here having only 1 embryo. I agree, but that doesn't take away the extreme frustration. He wants me to get rid of this lining and start over. OMG, can I please get a break here, I am so so tired.

He really didn't have any answers as to why this happened. I wondered if it was because I only had red spotting instead of a full AF, but the nurse said that shouldn't matter. She's leaning more towards it maybe being the BCPs. She told me to take 2 progesterone suppositories 2x/day for 6 days to bring on AF and then call her when it arrives and we'll go from there. Yippee, more drugs.

I had put a lot of time into my next post on the mind, some pretty cool stuff I learned from my hypno-therapy sessions. For now it will stay a draft and I hope to share it later.

Well, I gave it my best, there was nothing I feel I could have done better. 5 weeks of drugs, acup, chiro and hypno-therapy for nothing and I have to start all over again. We are due to leave in 3 days and now I need to cancel all travel plans. I guess I need to reset my transfer counter as well, from 6 days to go to 2 months, how sad. Hang in there my little Lucky Seven, I promise I will do my best next time.